this morning, at about 4 or 5, i heard things falling (crashing) and hitting the wall/floor, in the apartment next to my bedroom. i wasn't able to sleep because of this noise with an additional people yelling at each other (i'm pretty sure the guy was yelling and swearing and some woman was crying), so i decided to call the staff phone and see if they could check it out. well, joe answered the phone and he's the only one who usually even comes over to this apartment himself to address concerns and i called him back because i said i still heard it, he told me that he drove over to this apartment and checked what was going on- he said it wasn't between any of the clients in the living program that i'm in and i'd have to call the police if i wanted it to be taken care of. so, i called the cops and eventually i got up because my phone alarm went off to wake me up (i was already up) to go to my ARP therapy appointment. i got dressed and started to get something for breakfast when the cops called me and wanted to be let in the apartment building. so i walked to the door to let them in, i made sure that i pointed out the CORRECT apartment the noise was coming from because i wasn't sure they got the correct location from the 911 operator because i wasn't sure i specified correctly because i was in bed. i'm not sure how the police dealt with the situation because i went back into my apartment and continued to get ready for the appointment and i made something for breakfast. i don't hear anybody in that particular apartment now, i usually can hear the guy taking a piss when i'm in the bathroom and i don't hear that. then my psychologist came and had our session with me. i feel better being able to vent to someone once a week about what's going on with me since no one else seems to care. i told her about my frustration with douglas getting a job almost immediately after he first told me he had an interview but i still was happy for him that he got the job, she reassured me by telling me that it's probably because that particular job he interviewed for was more necessary and in demand compared to the jobs i interview for and i'm not sure if she said not as many people interviewed for those jobs? i expressed my frustration thinking that one of the reasons why they didn't hire me was because i'm disabled and i need to be doing something constructive to keep my mind from getting depressed while i think about different shit going on with my life. she suggested that i journal, which is basically what i do now but she suggested doing it with a pen and paper so it was more private because i've told her MANY times how my mom and sister seem to stalk me reading EVERYTHING i do on my blog. it's ok. one day you'll get lives of your own so you won't have to worry about what someone who ACTUALLY TRIES to make a living for themselves does! maybe one day when you drop the negativity and realize that *GASP* NO ONE IS GOING TO HELP YOU BUT YOURSELVES! you stop yourselves from TRULY living with your negativity and trying to drag people down with you. you're NOT gonna get yourselves anywhere doing that shit.. plus, using vulnerable children as shields while life kicks your ass isn't gonna happen anymore! and it will NOT be condoned by ME.
it's kinda odd that my neighbors were yelling at each other and fighting with each other, i tried to remember if there was another time they did this and i honestly don't remember. it feels like in the previous apartment that i used to live in on marshall, they also were fighting like this to the point i needed to call the cops a few times. then the brief thought if maybe i was hallucinating because of pills but i don't take any medication at night except for my calcium supplements and i seriously doubt they'd make me hear things. so HOPEFULLY i made the correct judgment by choosing to call the cops.
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